IV Meds Dragging me Down

I have been off my IV medications (therapy for my Lyme disease) for almost half a year, and starting back up on them has been no fun. They usual make one feel very exhausted and lethargic, which doesn't help me when doing yoga. I noticed that when I had practice on Monday with Barbara, I felt tired and heavy, and when I lifted my arms and legs, I became very lightheaded and even more fatigued. I tried to combat this by taking more breaks in between each sequence, or even little mini breaks in the middle of a series (ie: leg lifts, ankle twists, that sort of thing). I had been progressing so well up until this week, but now I feel like I have taken a few steps backwards. It's frustrating for me because I know without the meds I might be able to do more, but I am trying to focus on the things I can do in practice, rather than the things that might be more difficult. Taking breaks involves very deep, calming breaths, and I try to empty my mind of all thoughts, which leaves me feeling very centered and ready for more. Usually after practicing I would feel energized and rather calm (because of the meditation), but I have been feeling so wiped out afterwards. I noticed the same thing this afternoon, when Michelle was working with me. We learned a few new hand mudras, focusing on mudras for restful sleep, and twists, which are great for detoxing (and give the whole upper body such a release!). We made little videos of us practicing, which hopefully I can upload soon! Michelle filmed another chair yoga mini-class, which I have added a link to!

In my home practice (which has been less frequent since starting the meds, because of my lack of energy), I try to take things slowly and let my body set the pace, and say when it needs breaks. This is as it should be, and perhaps maybe this is what this lack of energy will teach me; that my body and mind, when they work together, can find a perfect solution to a problem that I feel is somewhat outside of my control.

Meditation is something that anyone can practice, no matter how fatigued. So I have been focusing on the meditation and hand mudras. Calming the body and mind can help both heal faster, and there is the science now to prove it! There is nothing like relaxation though. It's just so...relaxing! I'm getting very good at clearing my mind at will, and separating my mind from body (something I have always been good at, and use as a pain-coping strategy). So here's to taking 10, and just being!

Evening Lotus

Michelle mentioned that developing a nightly routine of both pose practice (asana), breathing (pranayama) and meditation (yoga nidra for sleep) might help with my insomnia. I have been using Michelle yoga nidra recording nightly (or actually several times a night) and it has really helped. It is really frustrating when you can't sleep, and try as I might not to focus on the fact that I am not sleeping, it occasional rears its ugly head in the back of my mind. Emptying my mind of all thought and just existing really helps me fight pain and calm my body. I sometimes notice that I am very tense while sleeping, my arms wrapped tightly around pillows, my face screwed up in pain. This is where the nidra really helps, by focusing on a small part of my body at a time and thinking about that part of the body relaxing. By shining the 'light of your mind' on a tense area of the body, your mind can calm this part of the body down, and piece by piece relax you.

I am working on editing an audio recording of our practice during class. Michelle explains the actions so clearly that it is possible to follow along without seeing anything. Its very relaxing just hearing a voice and not having to watch a video, especially if you are trying to reduce your exposure to blue light before bed.

Last night, as I was just a little way into my practice, working on mostly breathing exercises and hand mudras, I realized I could be sitting in half lotus for this. My joints are very swollen and painful, still and uncomfortable (although yoga is helping loosen them up!), so I decided to just go for half lotus. I found it incredibly easy and comfortable to sit that way, shocking myself. I thought, boy, if half lotus is this easy, I bet I could sit in full lotus (Padmasana), even though the last time I sat in full lotus was maybe 3-4 years ago. A month ago, before I started yoga, I would never have been able to even attempt a half lotus, and never would have dreamed of sitting in full! After just a few weeks of almost daily yoga practice, in relative comfort I could sit in full lotus! It was quite a stretch, and I couldn't hold it for a long period (I think because my joints are so swollen), but this is a fantastic start. I was just so proud of myself that I asked Mum to take my picture, even though I was in my clashing pajamas :P. As I was lying on my bed and lounging, I was able to sit in full lotus while on my back, which was a wonderful stretch. I suppose everything is possible with practice and dedication...a very exciting lesson for life.

first full lotus in 4 years!